Holiday Gifts to Avoid 2012

Christmas is tomorrow and hopefully all your shopping is done. But even more importantly, hopefully you've avoided the following list of gifts!

First up, let's take a look at this nice gift idea: a black cotton mac from (drum roll, please)... Pretty Green!

A cotton mac for the wealthy Oasis-obsessed Mod set.

I can't believe I'm going to say this but this isn't a bad piece of coat. Yup, a Pretty Green item I actually don't think is that bad. Nice, short collar with side pockets and epaulets. A step up from a parka if you're looking for protection from stormy weather. There's only one tiny snag in this little coat: it costs $1,100! Yes, you read that right: ONE-THOUSAND, ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. Pretty Green, are you for real? If ANY of you have the money for a gift like this, don't be stupid. Please use it for a gift certificate to your local tailor instead. Seriously, for that kind of money you could probably get an even more stylish jacket made to your specifications PLUS a tab-collar shirt to boot!

One for the ladies. So, you think you look 'mod.' You think you dance 'mod.' You think you pose 'mod' in all your Facebook profile pics. But guess what. You probably don't smell 'mod'! Well, now you can fix that with this offering from Avon:

The essence of a "60's mod" bottled up.

And this stuff just won't make you smell like any ol' mod. Nope, you'll be engulfed in the aroma of actual "60's mod". Personally, I don't know what that's like, seeing as I was born a few years after the sixties ended. But this little item might just complete your total vintage experience. You're at a club and spot some gal who thinks she looks like Peggy Moffitt. She's out there doin' her Sandy Sarjeant dances while eyeballin' that fellow you're with. Well, all you need to do is walk right past her, let her take in a whiff of "60's mod," and watch that crestfallen look on her face. She just lost the 'mod' game.

Some of you have families, right? You probably don't have much luck driving your kids to school on your scooter. You and the wife need to hit the supermarket for a week's worth of groceries and scooters just don't seem very practical. In these cases, life forces you to bust out the Mazda or SUV. How embarrassing it's gotta be if you're driving by people who think you're just some regular ol' joe barely existing through life. Well, solve that problem with this little window decal to let the whole world know exactly what you're about:

Will be right at home next to your cartoon family decal sticker.

 With this little sticker, you'll announce your presence to the world.. After all, it's an important thing to make sure strangers know you're 'mod.' After all, why else would you walk around in a parka covered in advertisements for your favorite bands or a Union Jack pin on your lapel?

A few weeks back, there was some 'controversy' over Paul Weller and his tank-top/flip-flop look. Many of you thought, "What's the big deal? He's just relaxing and they're just clothes!" Well, for those of you who enjoy relaxing and don't think style is all that important, have I got a gift suggestion for you! Union Jack Uggs!

Lucky for you, I can't read German and I'm too lazy to find the actual link to buy these things.

After all, Mods need down time too, right? If flip-flops are an acceptable shoe, then why not Uggs? And hey... these are Union Jack Uggs! They'll go great with jeans and a parka.

Aw hell, everyone's suffering from Quadrophenia Fever lately! Well, show off your love of everyone's favorite Mod opera with this awesome tee:

Come on... it don't get more Mod than this!

Show up to that next scooter rally dressed in this and a green pair of sta-prest and I guarantee you'll still be better dressed than 70% of the people there! (Trust me, I've seen photos of enough scooter rallies these days.)

Now, this last item is on the wrong list. Do NOT avoid this but rush out now and get it if you're a dog owner or know a Mod dog owner. It's so silly, it's so ridiculous, it's so wrong... that it's right.

(Thanks go my pal Fred Eagle over at http://fredeagle.blogspot.com/ for hippin' me to a piece of Dogrophenia!)

In general, I'm not into clothing for dogs. But, in this case, I'll make an exception. Your dog will be the Ace Face mutt runnin' around the yard in this thing. And if you're hungry for mod dog puns, then the We Are the Mods Facebook page as you hooked up!

That's it for bad gifts this year. Have a GREAT CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!
*

Mod Gone Wrong: Holiday Gifts to Avoid

First off, TODAY'S THE LAST DAY to enter the Mod Male drawing I posted about last week for a chance to win a small set of men's accessories: 2 vintage Ernst ties, a brand-new pocket square, and a brand-new pair of Bugatchi Uomo socks! For full details (and photos of items), visit Gifts for the Mod Male in YOUR Life and scroll to the bottom. But for the short version, all you have to do is one of two things:

1. Become a follower of this blog, if you're not already, and leave a comment on the blog telling me what your favorite clothing accessory (male or female) is. Or,
2. 'Like' the MOD MALE Facebook page and leave a comment on the page, telling me what your favorite clothing accessory (male or female) is.

Contest ends Tuesday, December 21st, at 6:00pm PST (that's tonight)! Good luck!

Now, let's move on with this week's post...
************************************
Last week, I offered up some gift suggestions for Mod males who are into a more refined style. This week, I'm doing the opposite.

I'd like to help you prevent any potential gift-giving malfunctions as you search out something special for that Mod guy in your life. And if any of these items are on his Christmas list, well, give him the gift of not looking silly by avoiding these.

First up, this little insta-Mod packet of badges (or pins):  

Okay, it's true... I would have totally bought this. When I was 16 years old!

In one fell Hot Topic-esque swoop, you get a small collection of badges representing just about every tired Mod cliche there is. Resist the urge though! Unless you're getting this for your 14-year-old nephew/niece who is starting to show an interest in Mod stuff, just walk away. The experienced Mod male (or female) in your life should totally be beyond this stage of Modism... hopefully.

How about a little slice of blasphemy to help ring in the holidays with this great little t-shirt:

Yes, Jesus on a scooter. This is real.

I hope you're as offended by this shirt as I am. Just look at that horrible graphic design! Basic sans-serif caps running crooked all over that shirt with no visual flow whatsoever, punctuated, of course, by a basic target... ugh! And let's not get into the bad silkscreen job.

Now, maybe you want to spend some clean cash on your favorite Mod male. Well, you can put that money toward a nice bespoke shirt, a new Technics turntable for all those dusty 45s, or this piece of military wear from Pretty Green:

Yes, a blue camouflage 'designer' army parka... the perfect gift for anyone looking to 'hide out' in a dark urban setting. How much will this gift set you back? Only SEVEN HUNDRED DOLLARS! Be warned though: if you two are walking down a city street during the evening, there's a good chance the wearer of this coat will just disappear into the night.

And while we're on the topic of bad clothing ideas for gifts, let's not forget this modern classic:

A wife-beater A tank-top A 'singlet' for the Mod male who's just given up on being a Mod male.

I've written about them before and although, personally, I'm not a desert boot fan myself, I think other people can look great in them, especially as part of their casual wear (i.e., not with suits). But then we start getting into real danger territory once you start considering the 'fashion' desert boot, like this:

If you're going to give the gift of desert boots, avoid any with patterns. Yes, I know this looks slightly op-artish and all, but really, stick with the traditional and save this fashion pattern for your Snuggie.

And the last gift idea to avoid this year for any Mod gentleman in your life? This right here:

Method. Of. Destruction.

Seriously, if you're thinking of giving your special guy THIS for Christmas, well... I think you both need to sit down and have a long, hard talk.

Mod Gone Wrong: The Pretty Green Parka

October's been a crazy month so I still haven't had a chance to write about our recent trip through the streets of Europe. However, there was one stop there that I was happy to skip: the Pretty Green store on Carnaby Street. I'm sure many of you are already familiar with this shop which specializes in overcharging people for dumpy, somehow-associated-with-Mod casual wear like this and this.* Oh yeah, and it's owned by one of those baggy-jeans-wearing Oasis guys.

Well yesterday, I came across this item off the the wonderful Modculture site:

What you're looking at here is an official "replica Quadrophenia parka." And yes, I just typed those words out. Folks, it's an army jacket. Or more accurately, a copy of an army jacket worn by 'Jimmy' on the cover of The Who's Quadrophenia LP. FOR SALE. Hey Pretty Green, why not sell a replica Blow-Up camera? Or how about a replica of the one of the coffee cups seen in an early Style Council photo?

Now like I said, this thing is actually for sale because, y'know, why get a real army parka when you can buy an authentic movie parka? What's so fancy about this particular jacket? It's a limited edition with only 100 copies made. Am I missing something here?

So I bet you're all wondering how much this thing is? Get ready for it: £500! Yes, you read that right. In American dollars that's... a lot of money!

Listen, I'm all for people digging on cool pop culture memorabilia. Y'know, maybe a reproduction of Darth Vadar's mask or an official Batman utility belt. But a non-descript army jacket that looks no different than a real army jacket? For £500?

Hey, if you want to spend the cash to look unslick, be my guest. Me, I'd rather spend it on a tailor-made suit.

*Okay, seems like they've started adding ready-to-wear suit jackets and trousers to their collection. That's a good thing, right?